Gullible Gourmands And Other Pretensions

The world's most expensive ice cream, according to a television programme I recently watched, earns its title due to the fact that its ice is sourced from the top of Mount Kilimanjaro.

The appropriately named Absurdity Sundae made from this ice cream is a mere 'snip' at $US 60,000 per serving.  Just how pretentious is that, and how jaded must be the appetites of the nouveau riche!

The Absurdity Sundae

Mind you, the sundae in question does come with a first class ticket and a souvenir t-shirt.

In keeping with these these gourmet pretensions I thought I would suggest a couple of equally far-fetched additions to the menu:

• The Salty Caramel Surprise -  using sea salt scooped up from the depths of the Mariana Trench by a replica of Jules Verne's Nautilus.
  
• Roar Coffee  - forget the Vietnamese weasel coffee, kopi luwak, made by collecting coffee beans eaten & passed  through wild civets.  My version is made from beans eaten and excreted by a reverse engineered chicken-to-dinosaur.

What all of the above goes to prove is that some people have more money than sense.  I would suggest the super rich try a good New Zealand hokey pokey ice cream.  It even tastes good when served in a private jet.

Singapore Food Delights

Singapore Food Delights
Classic Singapore dishes re-imagined
Roger Smith, 2015
See it here.

Spent this morning re-imagining some of my favorite Singapore foods.  The result can be seen here in this large Art Print - 36 inches X 21 inches

Sharks Fin Off The Menu

Shark's fin off the menu at Marina Bay Sands restaurants

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When Pseudo Science Is Finally Defeated

Kinoya Whale Meat Cans, Tokyo

I've never looked a whale in the eye.  Nor have I ever been tempted to eat one.  

My friends will testify that I have always been prepared to try anything on a dinner plate that is put in front of me, the one exception being a menu option I experienced in Stavanger, Norway.  

The restaurant were offering whale meat as a main and something within me rebelled against the thought of doing so.

Perhaps it was and is the idea of eating an animal that is critically endangered or that the meat in question was quite unprepossessing.  

A good dose of  angry cynicism about the Japanese instance on their right to conduct "scientific whaling" in our southern waters, when clearly they have been doing so to sell it in their open meat markets, no doubt contributed to my decision at the time.

Perhaps it was also a growing realisation of mankind's selfishness to consume every palatable species around us thereby sowing the seeds of our own inevitable destruction as a species.  Whatever the reason I settled for Norwegian salmon on the menu instead.  Although it is fair to report that two of my museum colleagues at that time did try it.

So I awoke this morning to the news that the International Court of Justice had handed down a ruling against Japanese whaling in southern waters, with a sense of relief as well as admiration for those who had campaigned so vociferously against the practice.

Not that I regard myself as a "Greenie' but I do appreciate nature's bounty and beauty both on my plate and around me.  It is selfish in the extreme to plunder the world's food resources without giving a damn about generations that will follow.

Now it will be a question of who is going to enforce the whale ban ruling?  I suspect both the New Zealand and Australian governments will police and enforce the ban.  At least I would like to think so.

It is perhaps no coincidence that today is April Fool's Day.  For once we have stopped fooling around with the balance of nature and have respected the rights and conservation needs of another deserving mammal.

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• UN court to rule on Japanese whaling
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• Antarctic whale hunts not scientific, ICJ rules

Mr Flakey Crust & The Six Kilometres Of Fame

It's a fairly well-know fact that if you eat a lot of pastry your days as an aspiring athlete are numbered.  Too much stodge does not a sprinter make!

So it comes as no great surprise to learn that the recent local entry winner of the Singapore marathon, a pastry chef called Tam Chua Puh, cheated.  

When he turned up at the tape several minutes ahead of Singapore's finest athletes it took the race organisers completely by surprise.  It transpires that Mr tam is somewhat of a dab hand at such deception having pulled the same ruse in the previous two marathons.

The reason; he simply wanted a medal and T-shirt for finishing the race.  So he ran 6 kilometres and then took a short cut to the finishing line, choosing to avoid running the additional 36 k's required for a legitimate result.

Of course he is but one in a long line of marathon cheats.  Take the case of Cuban born Rosie Ruiz who in 1980 was crowned the female winner of the 84th Boston Marathon.  She traveled by subway through the majority of  the course only to burst through spectators a half mile from the finish and claim victory at the finishing line.

Then there is a Michigan dentist who magically seems to appear on the winners podium despite being photographed near the back of the pack for the majority of the race.  Or the ex-Army mechanic who took a free ride on a spectator bus only to rejoin the Kielder Marathon and claim a medal.  The latter was subsequently disqualified as several people had noticed him hiding behind a tree near the finishing line before he slotted in behind the leading two runners near the finish.

I blame Tam Chua Puh's lethargy on his trade.  The best pastry, as any cook will tell you, is made with lard as its molecular structure gives a flaky crust.  And lard is a product of pork which, in combination with sugar and salt, is enough to slow anybody down.

Whatever his reasons or motivation, the marathon days of Mr Tam are well and truly over and he will have to content himself with jogging around McRitchie reservoir in the future.

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Keeping the Family Secrets Alive - Hawker Masters

I think it is an excellent initiative to acknowledge and reward the food heroes of Singapore.  The hawkers are the culinary backbone of the country and many of the dishes featured in this video were (and remain) personal favourites of mine.


As the list of winners proves, you really need to get out of Orchard Road to sample the true and authentic taste of Singaporean food.
It makes my mouth water just to think about it; it must be Makan Time!
There is now a Hawker Master Trainer pilot programme as well so aspiring hawkers can get up to speed on recipes under the guidance of the masters.

Get this Makan Time Button by clicking here.

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Thoughts On Durian Wine

I was always brought up the belief that wine was "fruit of the vine", although clearly now it "grows on trees".  I can't really comment on the pros and cons of a good vintage, durian wine as I have yet to sample it.

Fruit wines though are hardly a new idea and I can't see why durian would be any different.  The British have a long tradition of making fruit wines and I remember as a youngster trying to make some out of plums (we had a tree at the time that was over-burdened with fruit).

Despite the fact of my mother gives me generous support the result was a syrupy mess that was completely undrinkable.  The pet dog was kennelled in the same shed and whined to get out - that's how bad the smell of the vintage actually was!

In New Zealand there is a South Canterbury company called Barkers and although they are today better known for their fruit jams, chutneys and syrups, it is fruit wine that made them a national icon.

Blackcurrants grow very well in Canterbury and it was this fruit that Barkers has been exploiting.  My grandparents who lived in Dyers Pass Road in the Port Hills of Christchurch had a large patch of blackcurrant bushes and I have fond memoires of fresh blackcurrant jam during my infrequent visits from the North Island.

So will the NUS graduates students who created durian wine no branch out and produce a mangosteen cuvee? One would hope they give it a try.

The Frog's Lament

The Frog's Lament

To be a frog in Singapore

is not for the faint hearted

Hashima is our common fate

from oviducts soon parted

and once they get a taste for it

...well the craze has only started.

Roger Smith, June 2013

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Leechee Nuts? What are Leechee Nuts?

A Cooks Tour in Singapore with Anthony Bordain. Liked the Geylang market and the otak otak. Pity about the "slight tail wind" he experienced on the first night!

Personally though I prefer the tradional food courts.

The Chicken Nasi Briyani Economy

All You Ever Wanted To Know About Singapore's Chicken Nasi Briyani EconomyCook Your Own | Create infographics

The Singapore Makan (Food) Pacifier

Suffering from "makan withdrawal" symptoms? This could be the device for you.

The Singapore Makan Pacifier

The ideal going away gift for a colleague or friend.  Get yours here.  And yes, you could gift it to a baby if your really wanted to!

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Yay or Neigh?

Horsing around in the Singapore Media

Some Singaporean wit to start the day.  I am grateful to a friend for sending it to me.  It also reminds me that we often dined at IKEA in Alexandra Road.

IKEA had to recall its meatballs and other products as the'beef' turned out to contain horse meat as well.  To top it off, some of their cakes in Europe were found to have been contaminated by faecal matter -  not a good look.

Addressing the situation in true marketing style they have now re-introduced their meatballs to the Singapore menu at ten cents a piece.  I wonder what discount you can get on the cakes?

Stop Press:  IKEA has set a record in Singapore when it resumed selling its signature meatballs here, it said Saturday.
The furniture chain said it sold 249,375 meatballs in a single day on Friday, which is believed to be the Singapore record for largest number of meatballs cooked and sold in a day.
The 249,375 meatballs are estimated to weigh four tons in total.

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To Market, To Market

Girl and Hens - Kerikeri Market

The farmer's markets have become an integral part of New Zealand life in recent times; in many ways a harking back to much earlier days before the advent of general stores and supermarkets.

The appeal of them is that they tend to have much fresher and cheaper produce than the supermarkets, and home-baked goodies are very tempting.

This morning we paid a visit to the Sunday Farmer's Market in Kerikeri where we are staying for a few days.  The town and its environs are well know for the abundance of citrus and sub tropical fruits that thrice here.

Add to this wineries and macadamia nuts, boutique cheese operations, peace and tranquility and you get the general idea of why celebrities like Michael Crawford buy into the area.

Chilies -  Kerikeri Market

Nature' Bounty - Kerikeri Market

I Love Char Kway Teow!

Says it all really - get the shirt here

Death By Pizza

My goodness what are they trying to do?  Kill the population? A pizza within a pizza has go to be the most insane and calorie-laden piece of food around.  No wonder the Singapore fertility rate is dropping!  The body must be far to busy trying to deal with the fat intake from a meal like this.

They should be calling it "Double By-pass" not "Double Sensation".

Ramen Romps

Who cares about the Olympics and gold medals when there are much more important feats to celebrate. Take the Singapore Ramen championship for instance which was won by Ikkousha Ramen who have sold 100,000 bowls of the stuff in the past twelve months

The gentle art of noodle pulling has apparently become a 'fine art' under their tutelage. Ramen might well be regarded in the West as student fodder but in Asia they take it very seriously.


 And on the subject of matters culinary spare a thought for the FEDEX workers in the States who redefined the meanin of "some like it hot". 
A 19 litre container of liquid capsaicin, a chili pepper component destined for hot sauce was accidentally punctured by a forklift. resulting in a sudden evacuation.  I wonder what the health authorities made of this mishap?
Speaking of health, Bloomberg has just ranked Singapore as having the healthiest population in the world. It nudged out Italy, Australia, Switzerland and Japan for this honour. The country has a very strong healthcare system which means that residents are living longer and death rate is lower than it has been in the past. Get rid of the endemic cigarette smoking by new migrants and the result will be even higher.
Mind you such healthcare doesn't come cheaply so it is essential to have some form of insurance. We found NTUC's policies were best value for money. The added advantage is that they can be paid for out of CPF contributions.

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The Best Things Are Found In Stone Jars

Some of the best and most affordable lunches in Singapore can be found in the most surprising places.  One of the cafes that I frequented was at the British Council in Napier Road. It was convenient as I worked for the Council.

Called 6 Stone Jars it is run by the ebullient Peter Tan, a foodie and passionate golfer (when time allows).

Peter now has a twitter account which promotes South East Asian cuisine - SixStoneJars1.

6 Stone Jars twitter account - become a Follower

His cooking and that of his staff is very good indeed and the fare always varies; from European style to a scrumptious Indonesian style beef rendang.

Well worth a visit if you are in that part of Singapore around lunch time but a tip, get there early before the hungry students!

'Chendol Champions' & More!

		iPhone Covers, Orchid Jigsaws, So Shiok Ties & more!	See them all in the SingaporeSojourn Store

Chendol is one of my all time favourite desserts and inspired me to produce the design above.  Then I got to thinking, "How is it actually made?"

In Singapore I enjoyed the variety with red beans but it is apparently 'sacrilegious' to mention the word 'beans' in the same breath as the dessert; at least to Indonesians.

The video below gives a good demonstration of how the basic ingredients are prepared, without a fancy Chendol press to create the 'green worms'. Time consuming but delicious!